Why did I default to choosing the wrong kid to lead the business?

Bias. Birth order. Gender. Old advice from another founder. A story you told yourself decades ago about which kid was the responsible one. Kris Kluver, in The Dysfunctional Family Office, has Robert Mitchell apologize to his daughter Gail directly for exactly this. He had let bias, birth order, gender, and old advice create a blind spot. The wrong kid had been positioned for the role. The right kid had been overlooked for years. The pattern is universal in UHNW families. Most founders pick the successor in their head, alone, based on factors that have very little to do with capability or desire. The fix is to throw out the assumption and start over. Ask each adult kid what they actually want and what they're actually good at. Most founders, doing this honestly, end up with a different succession plan than the one they walked in with. The apology to the kids who were overlooked matters too.