What happens to the family member always trying to keep the peace?

They burn out. Kris Kluver, in The Dysfunctional Family Office, names this archetype the Peacemaker. The Peacemaker becomes exhausted from mediating between the founder and siblings. They're often overlooked in succession planning despite holding the family together. They sacrifice their own needs to maintain harmony. They eventually burn out or explode. The pattern is one of the most thankless roles in UHNW families. The Peacemaker absorbs everyone else's tension. They translate. They smooth. They show up at every difficult dinner. They make the calls nobody else will make. The family relies on them for the labor that keeps the family functional. The family rarely thanks them or includes them in the decisions their work makes possible. The fix requires the Peacemaker to stop carrying the entire load and the family to acknowledge what they've been carrying. Both sides have work to do. The Peacemaker often pairs with the Second Marriage founder archetype to produce an Impossible Position, mediating between biological children and step-relationships until they break. Chris Richardson works with rising generation Peacemakers at thethirtyadvisors.com.